The loss of a spouse, whether through death, divorce or some other circumstance is most always a very painful and tragic event in our lives. Often times we are faced with pain, guilt, questions, bitterness, hatred and many other emotions that come from our wayward spouse or these are emotions we feel ourselves. If we are not careful, it can be easy to fall into the "poor me syndrome". When I was married I had several close, single friends. In the early years of my singleness, one by one, I watched those single friends find love and eventually get married. I was full of jealously and bitterness because I wanted what they had, a loving spouse and a happy marriage, but God just wasn't putting anyone in my life and I continued to be single. I kept questioning God and asking him why was he sending someone to everyone else but me? How long do I have to wait until I can have that too? What more do you want from me? Have any of you ever felt that way? One day I was doing my daily bible study and God spoke to me through his word and he answered my questions. He lead me to 1Corinthians 7:34-35 which says,
"There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit, but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband. (vs 35) And I speak for your (the unmarried woman)own profit, not that I may cast a snare upon you, but for that which is comely, and that ye may attend upon the Lord with out distraction."
Now these verses are not suggesting that married women are ungodly horrible people because they have families to tend to. I know many married women who are godly christian women that have a servants heart for God. Now I know that most of us are not virgins, but these verses specifically say that the unmarried woman is to care for the things of the Lord with out distraction. That means that no matter what the reason is that God is allowing you to be single he wants your love, attention and devotion and wants you to serve him with out distraction in your life. For me he is trying to teach me patience. I need to wait on him and know that if he has someone out there for me that he will bring that person to me in his time, not mine. In the meantime, the bible says in Isaiah 54:4-6 (King James Version)
4Fear not; for thou shalt not be ashamed: neither be thou confounded; for thou shalt not be put to shame: for thou shalt forget the shame of thy youth, and shalt not remember the reproach of thy widowhood any more.
5For thy Maker is thine husband; the LORD of hosts is his name; and thy Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; The God of the whole earth shall he be called.
6For the LORD hath called thee as a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit, and a wife of youth, when thou wast refused, saith thy God.
Remember, patience is a virtue, so learn to be virtuous :-)